My quest for the Cruzzle.

The other night I noticed myself doing something a bit out of the ordinary after slipping on my comfy pants and doing my usual “après work” routine.


Oh sorry, not that.

It’s what I was doing after I poured myself a bit of Red. Without realizing it I found myself listening to the Beatles and Cat Stevens, sipping on my wine and doing crossword puzzles with the television off. Holy crap. After I got over the fact that I should check the mail to see if my AARP card had arrived, I actually found it quite peaceful so I continued on….for the next 2 hours. I’m not sure if you’ve ever done crossword puzzles before but that’s a long time in “cruzzle” time. And yes, I just made up a new word.

Anyways, this new hobby has spurred my desire to complete a full crossword puzzle. In essence, it’s my very own quest for the gold.

It’s true, I have yet to finish a cruzzle. The book clearly says EASY in big bold letters but I beg to differ. I’d like to know who’s actually assessing the difficulty level on these books they sell because I’m very interested in writing a letter expressing my thoughts on the matter.

Trying to complete one of these things is quite intense. I can’t begin to describe the myriad of emotions that have overcome me in my pursuit.

I’m sure as hell gonna try though.


Here we go:

You’ve just gotten 10 of the last 15 words right.

bb jesse dancing

You’re on a 5 to 10 word dry spell.

hit head

Are you f*#@ing kidding me? That has to be the right word!

smash keyboard

Why are my hands black? Oh yeah, these puzzles are printed like newspapers. It’s almost like I’ve teleported back in time with this new pastime of mine.

Anyways, who brings home the cheddah without getting a little cheese on themselves?imagesBGI1OO7G
I rest my case.

You’re well on your way to finishing and you realize you’ve just been punk’d by the Cruzzle Gods.

angry dwight


#so done

And again.

help me

The feeling that says to give up, move on and find a new hobby lingers, however you’re hit with a new energy saying failure is not an option.

gatorade me

To this day I have not completed an entire Cruzzle but believe me, I will continue this quest and it will most certainly end in victory.


Just remember…I’m doing this not only for myself but for those out there who feel my pain.


The struggle is real people and I’m here to tell the story.

United we stand.

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