Friday night….time to get crazy.

Ahh Friday at 5pm…what a beautiful beast you are for us nine-to-fivers.

It’s the weekend! So obviously there’s a few things I want to do tonight and I’m hoping it doesn’t get too crazy. I need to change my sheets, fold the mountain of laundry in the spare bedroom that continues to grow every time I wash another load and also take out the trash. Oh and if I have some time, I’ll catch up on the Dexter DVD from Netflix that’s been sitting on my coffee table for the past month and a half. Oh and check the mail. I NEED to check my mail.

Wait it’s Friday, when the hell did I turn 80?

Oh well, first things first. Time for a glass of wine.

5:29pm – First sip….yummy.

5:33pm – Let’s knock some stuff off my to-do list for the evening. Dexter Season 7 Episode 1. Who’s up next on your kill table Dex?

Sometimes I sit at my desk at work and think about this as co-workers talk to me.

6:28pm – One more episode of Dexter and then it’s on to something else productive. Let’s fill up the wine glass again though. Don’t judge me.

judging you

Assholes.

6:55pm – I find myself sympathizing with Dexter the ‘serial killer’ and oddly attracted to him. Is that weird? Probably. But’s he’s cute! In a strange way. Whatevs.

PAUSE!

more wine

7:23pm – Screw it there’s one more episode on this DVD. It would be wrong to stop now.

8:22pm – Chore #1 COMPLETE. Dexter’s been checked off the list. I feel pretty accomplished right now. Now would be the time to walk out to the mailbox and put that DVD in while retrieving the mail I haven’t checked in about 5 weeks. And doing that in 5, 4, 3, 2, let’s save that for the morning.

pouring wine

8:30pm – While I heat up some food I’ll knock something else off the list. Chore #2 COMPLETE! I took out the trash.

8:41pm – OMG I’m so hungry.

9:02pm – Mother f*cker! I forgot to take out the pizza boxes with the trash. Remind me to add that to tomorrow’s list. I was hoping to be able to relax but now I’ve already got shit to do.

9:09pm – Where the hell is the rest of my wine? Must be a damn hole in the bottle. This is bullshit.

10:18pm – I’m watching a Christmas movie on Lifetime. Dear God what has happened to me…it’s a Friday night, never mind the fact we haven’t even hit Thanksgiving yet. I remember the days when it was all shots of patrone and dancing on top of bars and now here I am…

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My To-Do list for tomorrow:

– Take out the pizza boxes.
– Fold the mountain of laundry that I may or may not get to tonight.
– Get my mail.
– Stock up on wine.
– Call mom to say hi.
– Go grocery shopping.

It’s like there’s no end to responsibility when you’re an adult.

shit sucks

11:32pm – I am completely wrapped up in this Lifetime movie. That chick should win an Oscar for her performance!

Agreed…I should go to bed now. Goodnight.

WTF!…I need to put sheets on my bed cus I tore them off earlier in an effort to make myself go to sleep in a clean bed.

shit shit shit

Ugh Chore #3 to be completed ASAP.

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