Okay…One more.

I really do believe I start off my endeavors with the best of intentions, however I find more and more that it sure as hell doesn’t take long for those plans to go off course. In my defense though, life is short.


Let’s take for instance this past Saturday night. I’m in my 30’s and so I keep feeling I should probably start acting my age. What better way to do that than to go out on a Saturday night for dinner and limit myself to just a drink or two.

Pfft….I can do that.


Alright things are going well, I’ve had dinner and a couple of glasses of wine. Okay and maybe a beer or two but who’s counting? Anyways the point is we paid the check and headed out of the bar before the clock even hit 9:30. Now that’s impressive. Gotta tell ya, I was feelin’ pretty responsible and grown up at that moment.

So we’re walking over to our vehicles and what do ya know, there’s a bar right next to where we parked! “Oh, let’s just stop in for one real quick. One and done, that’s it.”

As soon as I got a drink, I looked across the bar and noticed my brother and some of his friends. That would be the moment it proceeded to go downhill. I can’t say no to partying!

From there, well you know how it goes….

Picture time!


Hit the dance floor? OK!


I’m thirsty. Problem solved!


Are they bumpin’ Salt n Pepa right now? Awww shit, that’s my jam! I’m ready to rap it out karaoke style.


So a little while later I’m there on the dance floor with my brother’s best friend dancing to something classy (I think either Back That Ass Up or Bitch Betta Have My Money) when this girl comes over and starts putting the moves on me.


She proceeds to start talking to us and Leroy* thought that saying we were celebrating our three year anniversary might send her on her way. Nope. She let us know that for $200 we could have her for the night. Haha you’re funny girl!


It took me a moment to realize what was happening. Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was the fact that I’ve never been propositioned quite like that…but needless to say I was left a bit speechless. So I did what anyone else would do right?

To the bar Leroy*!


At this point I was a bit disturbed at what just had transpired so of course I had to address it.

Me: Are you serious???
Leroy*: I know! That was totally a hooker!
Me: No, you’re really gonna take me to the Wave for our three year anniversary!?!?
Leroy*: Oh well ya, I told her this is where we first met!
Me: Aww, you’re such a romantic Leroy*!


I kid I kid. I didn’t really do that! Ok maybe I thought it, but I didn’t do it.


Well that Saturday night out has already become a story that we’ll laugh about for years to come. I didn’t get home until well into the early morning, my car slept at the parking lot downtown, and I was a bit hungover the next day but the night was a success. It was a success because it was fun.

As ridiculous as it was and in the grand scheme of things it was just another drunken evening, however the moral of my story is this….

Try all you want to limit yourself and create rules to reflect how you ‘should’ be acting but at the end of the day who has more fun? The drooling dog chained to the lamp post 10 feet away from the hot dog stand or the kid in the candy store who’s let off his leash with a $20 bill?

You decide.


*As always, names have been changed to protect the guilty.

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