4th of July Vaca – Day 2


Thursday – July 4, 2013

*As always, names have been changed to protect the guilty.

6:00am – All of a sudden I’m startled awake by Cassidy* who is waking me up along with my cousin Miguel*.

It takes me a moment to remember that I’m curled up on a lumpy couch with no pillow and they want to leave and head home to sleep in real beds. Okay, I’m no longer angry. By the way, I should mention all 3 of us slept on a wraparound couch so you can imagine how comfortable that was.

As I roll off the couch I realize I’ve only had about 3 hours of sleep but I don’t feel half bad. I just can’t figure out if it’s because I’m not hungover or I’m still drunk. I can’t for the life of me believe that I’m not hungover after last night so I’m just going to assume…

11:00am – Just made it to my parents camp. I’ve showered up, mom just made me a plate of food and now I’m good to go. Let’s do this! It’s the 4th of July, no time to waste!

5 minutes later….

2:03pm – Well that nap was unexpected. Let’s try this again. Time to crack one open.


Meanwhile people keep stopping over on boats; my parents camp is like Grand Central Station right now. Even better, my bro just showed up on one of the boats with Cassidy*, Miguel* and some of our friends and they’re all stumbling their way off the dock. Oh ya I’m hitching a ride on that boat later!

4:52pm – Alright time to head for the high seas. I grab some beers and let the fam know I’m heading out for a “cocktail” cruise on the party boat.  Just one drink, I won’t be long! Translation…

We’re now out in the middle of the lake and seem to have become part of a large gathering of boats, almost like we’ve created our own little boat island consisting of nothing but board shorts, bikinis, booze and drunk people. Now this is a party!

LET US OUT! Now somewhere along the line we must have started growing up and believe it or not maturing because we all look around at each other as drunk people are falling onto our boat, screaming in our ears and spilling drinks all over us. Dude! Stop spilling your drink on me! That’s what we “older” people refer to as Alcohol Abuse.

11:38pm – I’ve just been dropped off the boat and everyone is sitting around the fire enjoying themselves while I try to walk a straight line off the dock to avoid a late night dip in the water.

Mission accomplished! My parents, aunts, uncles and cousins all look surprisingly impressed by my accomplishment.

Apparently I felt like I was still good to go because I grabbed a beer and took a seat in the circle. Things were going well up until the point I needed another drink and turned to my (quite sheltered) 16-year old cousin and asked him if he wanted a beer as well. He politely declined with a nervous smile and then I proceeded to get an earful from my mother about how inappropriate that was and received a couple of glares from my aunt. What? I was throwing ’em back at that age!

And on that note, it’s time for bed.


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