Anyone that knows me has realized that working out is not on the top of my to-do list. Actually I don’t even think I have a to-do list but you can bet if I did, exercise would probably be at the bottom of it. Why? I’m lazy, plain and simple.
I’ve always been lucky and had a fast metabolism, so while I am on the smaller side, I am very much out of shape. Because of this I was repeatedly told that as I became older my metabolism would slow down and all the junk food, drinking and late night alcohol-fueled McDonald’s runs would inevitably catch up with me. Apparently they were right as I’ve put on a bit of a belly in the last six months or so.
Tomorrow marks the start of Memorial Day Weekend, the unofficial start to Summer. Two words….Bikini Season.
So as the hot Summer months full of bikinis and men fast approach, it’s become clear that I need to prepare myself for the upcoming season in a new way. Now it’s not too long ago that my preparations for days in the sun consisted primarily of shopping for new bathing suits and “pre-season training” (a.k.a. drinking) in an effort to gear up for the parties and social get-togethers that occur more frequently as the nights get hotter.
Now here I am in the midst of pre-season training and instead of perfecting my skills of tossing ping pong balls into red solo cups, I was anxiously awaiting my delivery from Amazon of a 30 minute DVD selling high hopes to folks everywhere of a tight ass, toned arms and six-pack abs in just 30 days. Bring it on Jillian Michaels. I’m ready.
Now in all fairness I was warned that when working out with Jillian, the motto tended to be No Pain No Gain.
How hard could it be?
I retract my previous statement. I really thought I might keel over during that first workout. In the couple of days that followed my introduction to Jillian (whom I like to think of as my own personal Drill Seargeant), everything hurt. No joke, like evvvverything. My legs, arms, back, neck, ass, ears, eyebrows, right fingernail…you name it and it hurt.
Now it’s been three weeks and shredding has gotten a lot easier and the important thing is, I’ve stuck with it. Maybe it’s not long-term commitment status or anything but still impressive for me. Here’s the interesting part that surprised me though, I like it. It feels good. I have more energy and although I don’t think I’m on my way to a six-pack (well maybe only if it’s the type I can pick up at the nearest 7-Eleven), I am seeing some results and getting in shape a bit.
Realistically, I could probably carve out an ab or two if I gave up a couple of my other guilty pleasures but there’s a time for honesty and that time is now. I will continue to Shred and/or workout in some fashion, eat healthier, refrain from soda and local fast food establishments but some things just can’t be avoided. My kryptonite, if you will.
Here’s to you Pizza, eh you too alcohol, in all of your glorious forms. I love you and will never leave you. I’ll be seeing you soon.
And yes Pizza. Yes, I will marry you.